Masculine Monday- #10

*Men Only*

There are not a lot of people that a man needs in life. Oh, there are plenty that a man would do well to have in life. And would be better off to have, certainly. But to actually need?

There are precious few of such truly necessary people. A mother and father, naturally (otherwise he wouldn’t be here). But after that? I would argue it is a fairly short list, at that. Some debate can no doubt be had on the subject, and my readers can feel free to give their piece in the comments, as I will give mine here. The only other two on the list I would say are a good confessor and an honest friend. The former can be debated in another post, it is the latter that I address in today’s short post.

I would argue that a man needs a good and honest friend. What do I mean by “a good and honest friend?” I mean a friend who a man can confide in, and know his confidences will be respected. A person who will tell him the truth when no one else will. Someone who will tell a man the truth even when the man doesn’t want to hear the truth.

No man can be right all the time. We all make mistakes, we all err (as an aside, they are not the same thing).  So it is essential to have someone in our life who will tell us what we need to hear, even and especially when we don’t want to hear it. Naturally enough, that friend also needs to be a man.

If a man has a wife, she cannot be that honest friend. If she is truly devoted to him and reveres him, then she cannot be unbiased when he is concerned. She won’t be capable of the brutal honesty required. And if she is not devoted to him, and reviles him, well then, her words cannot be trusted there either.

A man’s parents, if they still live, also cannot fulfill this role. They too are biased, by both blood and the long years of nurture that were invested in raising the man to adulthood.

No, a man needs another man, one who will act as a true brother to him. An actual brother could fill this role, but it is just as capably (if not more so) carried out by another.

So I invite my readers to stop and consider whether they have such a friend. If the answer is no, I think they would be well advised to make finding such a friend a top priority in their life.

Tuesday Tips- #4

It has been a few weeks, but the series by reader Michael K returns. Today’s topic is the Economy:

 Tip #4: It’s the Economy, Stupid (Part 1)

 

Note: These tips are about action. But some theory is needed on this one, so it’s two installments.

Most people intuitively understand something is wrong with jobs, wages, and the economy today. The upper third is sometimes unaware of this. If this is you, wake up. Many of your fellow citizens are living “on the edge”. They are isolated, vulnerable, unprotected, and often ashamed. Family breakdown is omnipresent. Ignore this growing reality at your peril.

 

My claim: the US has been in a hidden depression since 2008. And many people are starting to agree; witness the dramatic political rise of Trump (a protectionist) and Sanders (a socialist) in a mere eight years.

 

This depression has its roots in the past Great Depression. The creation of the Fed, paper money, and the resultant Roaring ‘20s set that stage, and the resulting depression required a World War and a near government takeover of the economy (900% debt/GDP) to pull through. And once a nation has tasted debt and tax-and-spend economy, it can never fully let it go.

 

By 1964 total US credit reached $1 trillion. 44 years later, in 2008, it was 50 times higher. The only way this was possible without hyperinflation? A massive trade deficit to soak up these dollars. The US went from the world’s largest creditor to the world’s largest debtor in a single generation. This was a party to remember!

 

But why would other nations fund this debt? Jobs! We handed over our industrial capacity. This destroyed our working class families. But government welfare appeases the masses. And as a progressive bonus, generous welfare for women and children sans men makes male breadwinners unnecessary. Who’s your Daddy? Uncle Sam. Toss in unbridled immigration of the world’s desperately poor, and the progressive circle is complete. It’s a cognitive elite paradise. And a disaster for working-class, traditional families.

 

This American credit bubble has transformed the global economy. The world gratefully took our jobs (or became our slaves, depending on your viewpoint). But eventually the US hit the debt “wall” in 2008. For the first time since the Great Depression, total US credit contracted. We simply couldn’t take on any more debt with our shrinking middle class.

 

The panic was (and is) real. Without endless stimulus, this multi-generation debt bubble will collapse. This won’t be allowed to happen. Government will continue to own the commanding heights of the economy. It’s better to die tomorrow than die today. We will print as long as we possibly can.

It’s a catch22. Households cannot run up more private debt without living wage jobs and a more equitable distribution of wealth. But the 2015 median wage in China was $8.13 per DAY. And in three years, 2011–2013, China has mixed more cement than the US did over the entire last century. Jobs! So US companies buy back their stocks to create even more jobs overseas and less here. Stock owners are in heaven. We are now Mexico, a land of the Haves and the Have Nots. It’s Yale or Jail. Male breadwinners (outside of the professional class) are now endangered and persecuted.

 

So we will continue to print. Only a few paths are left to stimulate the economy: Welfare. War. Pork-barrel government spending. Take your pick. Just remember the latter two actually create jobs, and are thus far more likely.

 

But America remains wealthy and moderately free, at least for now, and therefore remains the cleanest shirt in a very dirty laundry pile. For those who can adjust their mindset, look through the injustice to the other side, and take action, real opportunity exists. And that’s for Part 2.

Selected Sunday Scriptures- #109

Our God has provided us with many blessings, and promised yet more to come. This has been so with the faith even since the days of the Patriarchs and up to the present day. Yet we so often seem to forget that there is always a condition attached to these promises. Examples:

If you will only obey the Lord your God, by diligently observing all his commandments that I am commanding you today, the Lord your God will set you high above all the nations of the earth; ² all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, if you obey the Lord your God:

³ Blessed shall you be in the city, and blessed shall you be in the field.

⁴ Blessed shall be the fruit of your womb, the fruit of your ground, and the fruit of your livestock, both the increase of your cattle and the issue of your flock.

⁵ Blessed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl.

⁶ Blessed shall you be when you come in, and blessed shall you be when you go out.

⁷ The Lord will cause your enemies who rise against you to be defeated before you; they shall come out against you one way, and flee before you seven ways. ⁸ The Lord will command the blessing upon you in your barns, and in all that you undertake; he will bless you in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. ⁹ The Lord will establish you as his holy people, as he has sworn to you, if you keep the commandments of the Lord your God and walk in his ways. ¹⁰ All the peoples of the earth shall see that you are called by the name of the Lord, and they shall be afraid of you. ¹¹ The Lord will make you abound in prosperity, in the fruit of your womb, in the fruit of your livestock, and in the fruit of your ground in the land that the Lord swore to your ancestors to give you. ¹² The Lord will open for you his rich storehouse, the heavens, to give the rain of your land in its season and to bless all your undertakings. You will lend to many nations, but you will not borrow. ¹³ The Lord will make you the head, and not the tail; you shall be only at the top, and not at the bottom—if you obey the commandments of the Lord your God, which I am commanding you today, by diligently observing them, ¹⁴ and if you do not turn aside from any of the words that I am commanding you today, either to the right or to the left, following other gods to serve them.

Note that most important of words- “if.”

Here are some from the New Testament:

³² “Everyone therefore who acknowledges me before others, I also will acknowledge before my Father in heaven; ³³ but whoever denies me before others, I also will deny before my Father in heaven.

(Matthew 10:32-33)

⁴⁶ While he was still speaking to the crowds, his mother and his brothers were standing outside, wanting to speak to him. ⁴⁷ Someone told him, “Look, your mother and your brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.” ⁴⁸ But to the one who had told him this, Jesus replied, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” ⁴⁹ And pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! ⁵⁰ For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

(Matthew 12:46-50)

¹² “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. ¹³ Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. ¹⁴ You are my friends if you do what I command you. ¹⁵ No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. ¹⁶ You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide; so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. ¹⁷ This I command you, to love one another.

(John 15:12-17)

It is important that we not lose sight of the fact that so much of what God promises is based on our following Him. Unfortunately, in this day and age that teaching has fallen by the wayside. We hear “Jesus loves us”, but we don’t hear, or ignore, the requirements of that love. Everything has a price, which even Jesus himself tried to make clear to us:

²⁸ For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? ²⁹ Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, ³⁰ saying, ‘This man began to build, and was not able to finish.’ ³¹ Or what king, going to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and take counsel whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? ³² And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends an embassy and asks terms of peace.

(Luke 14:28-32)

Today is as good a day as any to sit down and count the cost of discipleship. It is something I do often. Always I find the price to be terribly steep- but worth it, considering the payoff in the end.

An Abundance Of Concern

I would like to clarify something from my previous post: I am not advocating that men adopt an abundance mentality. Least of all Christian men.

Rather, I was trying to explain that there was a similarity between the “Abundance Mentality” and a mindset which doesn’t care about how women view you.

Deep Strength explores much of what is wrong with the Abundance Mentality, at least as it concerns Christians, here.

As a prescriptive matter, I think men need to do a couple of things. Here are just a few:

• Stop caring what women think of you, especially women you might be interested in.
• Look for women who will be a good fit for you.
• Create an atmosphere of command (a concept worth exploring more later)
• Build yourself up- physically, mentally, economically and spiritually

Feel free to disagree or add your own thoughts as you see fit.

What Will She Think Of Me? -Masculine Monday- #9

*Men Only*

My last Masculine Monday post was aimed at helping men in their interactions with women. Specifically, it was all about saying “No” to women. This post continues that trend, and was inspired in part by Dalrock’s most recent post.

One of the most important flaws that a man needs to excise from his mind is the question we are inclined by both nature and culture to ask: What will she think of me?

We need to stop caring what women think of us. We need to stop worrying that the girl we like might get a bad impression about us. We need to let go of our anxiety about what impact our actions will have on the way that women view us.

Letting go of this bad habit will only make our life that much better; including with women. Seriously, I speak from personal experience here. Many of strongest reactions (read, IOIs) I have gotten in my life are from the women I have cared the least about (at least as far as their opinion of me is concerned). A lot of PUAs say pretty much the same thing, at least from my limited understanding of them.

This ties in a bit with what “Game” types call an abundance mentality. I will save the definition for others, but there is a solid connection here. Having an abundance mentality requires a mindset in a man where he can let a woman go without a second thought. That mindset requires in turn that a man not care about what women (specifically that woman) think of him.

So guys, stop asking yourself: “what will she think of me?” when you are trying to decide something. Instead, ask yourself what God will think of you. After all, His is the only opinion that matters.

As always with this series, my readers are encouraged to offer their own thoughts, suggestions and tips on the subject.

Selected Sunday Scriptures- #108

Today’s post will focus on the Psalms, as I haven’t covered them much as of late.

One thing that is fascinating about many of the Psalms attributed to King David is how… plaintive they are. For example:

How long, O Lord? Wilt thou forget me for ever?
    How long wilt thou hide thy face from me?
² How long must I bear pain in my soul,
    and have sorrow in my heart all the day?
How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?

³ Consider and answer me, O Lord my God;
    lighten my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death;
⁴ lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him”;
    lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.

⁵ But I have trusted in thy steadfast love;
    my heart shall rejoice in thy salvation.
⁶ I will sing to the Lord,
    because he has dealt bountifully with me.

(Psalm 13)

I sometimes find it easy to forget that King David wasn’t always, you know, King David. Before that he was a soldier and before that a shepherd. Long before he reached the heights of his success he had to endure a considerable amount of suffering and hardship. And even as King he endured much (although a lot of that was his own fault). But before then, David knew full well just how much he relied upon God to be saved from all his distress.

Consider this Psalm:

Vindicate me, O Lord,
    for I have walked in my integrity,
    and I have trusted in the Lord without wavering.
² Prove me, O Lord, and try me;
    test my heart and my mind.
³ For thy steadfast love is before my eyes,
    and I walk in faithfulness to thee.

⁴ I do not sit with false men,
    nor do I consort with dissemblers;
⁵ I hate the company of evildoers,
    and I will not sit with the wicked.

⁶ I wash my hands in innocence,
    and go about thy altar, O Lord,
⁷ singing aloud a song of thanksgiving,
    and telling all thy wondrous deeds.

⁸ O Lord, I love the habitation of thy house,
    and the place where thy glory dwells.
⁹ Sweep me not away with sinners,
    nor my life with bloodthirsty men,
¹⁰ men in whose hands are evil devices,
    and whose right hands are full of bribes.

¹¹ But as for me, I walk in my integrity;
    redeem me, and be gracious to me.
¹² My foot stands on level ground;
    in the great congregation I will bless the Lord.

(Psalm 26)

Perhaps it is just me, but I get the feeling that this Psalm was written before he became King. As time passed on, David found, like many powerful men and women throughout history, that staying away from wickedness is easier said than done.

Finally, I find this part of Psalm 32 interesting:

Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven,
    whose sin is covered.
² Blessed is the man to whom the Lord imputes no iniquity,
    and in whose spirit there is no deceit.

(Psalm 32:1-2)

St. Paul references this in Romans 4 as evidence of justification by faith. Why this was so wasn’t immediately apparent to me years ago when I re-read Romans. But looking back to the Psalms helped me understand. This blessedness is a gift- God dispenses favors upon those whom he loves. This is a gift from God that is not something that we can every “buy.” No works of ours can earn it, and thus it shows the greater value of what is offered by God in his new testament with us.

You Don’t Own Me

I suspect that a fair number of my readers, or at least, those who are somewhat cognizant of pop culture, might have seen this trailer for Suicide Squad:

The first half of the trailer features a song, originally by Leslie Gore, titled “You Don’t Own Me.” I wasn’t familiar with it before this trailer, but wish I had been. It is a rather impressive piece in that it encapsulates so much of contemporary female thinking and behavior. Here are the full lyrics:

You don’t own me
I’m not just one of your many toys
You don’t own me
Don’t say I can’t go with other boys

And don’t tell me what to do
Don’t tell me what to say
And please, when I go out with you
Don’t put me on display ’cause

You don’t own me
Don’t try to change me in any way
You don’t own me
Don’t tie me down ’cause I’d never stay

I don’t tell you what to say
I don’t tell you what to do
So just let me be myself
That’s all I ask of you

I’m young and I love to be young
I’m free and I love to be free
To live my life the way I want
To say and do whatever I please

And don’t tell me what to do
Oh, don’t tell me what to say
And please, when I go out with you
Don’t put me on display

I don’t tell you what to say
Oh, don’t tell you what to do
So just let me be myself
That’s all I ask of you

I’m young and I love to be young
I’m free and I love to be free
To live

Perhaps it is just me, but this song touches on a huge number of RP subjects. Heck, it almost seems like a parody of some of the stuff Rollo has covered over the years. Here are just a few subjects covered:

1. “Open” Relationships
2. Men shouldn’t try and change women
3. Young women need to be free to “find themselves”
4. Commitment is on a woman’s terms only

and so on and so forth.

Keep in mind this song dates back to 1964. That is right, over 50 years ago. What we are seeing now in women is nothing new. The difference is the environment- it is far more hospitable to this type of behavior than it was in the past. But the desire was already there; it was always there.

Oh, and is it just me, or does this whole song seem like a fitness test writ large?

Masculine Monday- #8

*Men Only*

Short and simple post today, with a short and simple message to men:

Learn how to say “No” to women.

Seriously, if you have trouble with it now, learn to do it. Your life will become so much better for it.

And, dare I say, so will the lives of most of the women who are part of it.

I might be a bit presumptuous here, but I think most men spend a lot of time trying to get women to say “Yes” to various things. But learning to say “No” to when when necessary can get you just as much. In fact, I would warrant a guess that you saying “No” just might be a factor in her saying “Yes.”

This is easier said than done, of course. We men have an instinctive desire to please women. We don’t like it when when are upset. And of course, we are fearful of being tagged a misogynist or the like.  Couple that with a Western upbringing indoctrination, and most men in the West end up as the ones saying “Yes.”

So perhaps some of my male readers would be kind enough to offer their advice on how they learned to overcome all of that.  Guys, what happened you learn to say “No” to women?

[This post was inspired by Dalrock’s recent examination of how many Christian leaders are fearful of telling the women in their congregation “No” in any way, especially the important ones.]

Random Musings and Links- #8

Been preoccupied lately, and so blogging has slacked. Here are some links and thoughts in the interim.

Deep Strength has had several good posts lately. One is a story about a Real Life Ruth. The second discusses how to approach the topic of attraction with Christians. Principally how to explain the subject to Christian men who are “Blue Pill.”

Ace of Spades returns for two short but important posts. The first deals with when to speak and when not to speak on the internet. The second concerns how a man should act when he no longer trusts his woman.

Mrs. ktc talks about NFP gone horribly wrong.

Zippy talks about Whitewashing and “pastoral mercy.”

Dalrock points out, once again, that divorce is meant to provide Cash and Prizes to women.

Free Northerner discusses “Virtue Signalling.” Not sure I exactly agree with his view, but it is an interesting discussion all the same.

Cane Caldo continues to shred the “Pro-Life” movement.

Now for some random musing…

I was thinking recently about how I would react if someone tried to match me a
“reformed bad girl.” It’s been a while, and I don’t remember how I reacted last time. So I am curious how my readers in a position similar to mine would react. And by react, I mean what would you think/feel, and also what would you say or do in response? Would the person conducting the match-making make a difference in your response?

In addition, I was struck by how easily men will lap up the rather consistent lie that women are “taken advantage of” by unscrupulous men all the time. Why do we soak up this lie so easily? Is this some cultural thing? A genetic component of being a man? I’m curious, because it is so obviously ridiculous when you actually confront the lie. Yet we do it all the time. I am curious what my readers think.

 

 

Selected Sunday Scriptures- #107

Given the recent discussion in this post about marriage and the responsibilities of setting it up, I think a post which covers some scripture on the topic would be appropriate. Without further ado:

House and wealth are inherited from parents,
    but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

(Proverbs 19:14)

A capable wife who can find?
    She is far more precious than jewels.

(Proverbs 31:10)

²⁴ Do you have daughters? Be concerned for their chastity,
    and do not show yourself too indulgent with them.
²⁵ Give a daughter in marriage, and you complete a great task;
    but give her to a sensible man.

(Sirach 7:24-25)

[I should note that the verse before these, 7:23, has a different reading in the Hebrew text which states something along the lines of this:

“Do you have sons? Choose wives for them while they are young.”

 A sensible daughter obtains her husband,
    but one who acts shamefully brings grief to her father.

(Sirach 22:4)

³ For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from fornication; ⁴ that each one of you know how to control your own body^[b] in holiness and honor, ⁵ not with lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God;

(Thessalonians 4:3-5)

The footnote reads: Or how to take a wife for himself.

These are just a few quotes from scripture. I believe there are a few others to be found as well. I mention these because there is a lot of misunderstanding about marriage right now.

It is not merely a man’s responsibility to find his wife and get married. But all the same he does need to know how to take a wife for himself.

Nor is it entirely up to a woman either. Yet she who is sensible or wise knows how to obtain a husband of her own as well.

Further, it is a parents duty to help their children find spouses as well. I quoted from Sirach before, and here are a few parts of St. John Chrysostom’s 9th homily on First Timothy:

Youth is wild, and requires many governors, teachers, directors, attendants, and tutors; and after all these, it is a happiness if it be restrained. For as a horse not broken in, or a wild beast untamed, such is youth. But if from the beginning, from the earliest age, we fix it in good rules, much pains will not be required afterwards; for good habits formed will be to them as a law. Let us not suffer them to do anything which is agreeable, but injurious; nor let us indulge them, as forsooth but children. Especially let us train them in chastity, for there is the very bane of youth. For this many struggles, much attention will be necessary. Let us take wives for them early, so that their brides may receive their bodies pure and unpolluted, so their loves will be more ardent. He that is chaste before marriage, much more will he be chaste after it; and he that practiced fornication before, will practice it after marriage. All bread, it is said, is sweet to the fornicator. Sirach 23:17 Garlands are wont to be worn on the heads of bridegrooms, as a symbol of victory, betokening that they approach the marriage bed unconquered by pleasure. But if captivated by pleasure he has given himself up to harlots, why does he wear the garland, since he has been subdued?

…

Mothers, be specially careful to regulate your daughters well; for the management of them is easy. Be watchful over them, that they may be keepers at home. Above all, instruct them to be pious, modest, despisers of wealth, indifferent to ornament. In this way dispose of them in marriage. For if you form them in this way, you will save not only them, but the husband who is destined to marry them, and not the husband only, but the children, not the children only, but the grandchildren. For the root being made good, good branches will shoot forth, and still become better, and for all these you will receive a reward. Let us do all things therefore, as benefiting not only one soul, but many through that one. For they ought to go from their father’s house to marriage, as combatants from the school of exercise, furnished with all necessary knowledge, and to be as leaven able to transform the whole lump to its own virtue.

The point I want to make is this:

Marriage is something that everyone has a responsibility in helping set up- parents, son, and daughter. Our atomized and individualist age wants to try and push this job away to someone, anyone else. But the truth is that everyone has a part to play. Everyone needs to be proactive.

Young men need to actively seek out marriageable young women and they need to know how to woo them.

Young women also need to actively seek out marriageable young men and they need to know how to properly indicate their interest.

Parents need to help their children find potential spouse candidates. One man or woman by himself will have difficulty in this task. It takes a concerted effort.