The Strain

There is a terrible condition out there now that is afflicting many western men.

If not treated, it can lead to a lifetime of suffering, and in some circumstances, even death.

Even worse, many men do not realize that they have it.

What is this awful malady, pray tell?

It is Oneitis.

 

To give it my best try at describing it…

Oneitis is the belief that one single, specific, identifiable person out there is THE ONE for you and you must wait until that person finally recognizes this; that is, that single person is your soul mate whom you must, nay, are destined, to be with and it will become so in the end, despite your soul mate not realizing it at the time.

 

A person with oneitis will forsake all other possibilities and options to be with The One. This “crush” will override reason and can blind someone to the glaring red flags found in their “soulmate.” This is, of course, terrifyingly disastrous for the person with Oneitis. They will endure unnecessary frustration, angst and misery.

This can come about several ways. For one, they will ignore other, better romantic options. Two, they will give more and more power over to the other person if a relationship does develop. Three, they will be blind to the flaws in the other person, even when such flaws should compel a reasonable person to run away.

Now, all of that is descriptive. Here is the prescriptive part of the post:

Readers, Commenters and Fellow Bloggers, warn your male friends and family about the dangers of Oneitis. Tell them that is is deadly, and can and will ruin their life.

Explain that there is no such thing as a “Soul Mate.” It is pagan nonsense. Point out how it clouds reason, and blinds them  to other, better possibilities. Remind them that there are BILLIONS of women on this planet- there are plenty of other options out there. Help them understand that it is highly unattractive to women, and will only frustrate their romantic endeavors.

Do the men in your life a favor, and help cure their Oneitis. The whole world will be better off for it.

Advertisements

14 Comments

Filed under Attraction, Beta, Blue Pill, Marriage Market Place, Men, Red Pill, Sexual Market Place, Sexual Strategies, State of Nature

14 responses to “The Strain

  1. Women can have oneitis too…except they call it something different…what was it…alpha widow?

  2. Alpha Widow(ism) is something different Lovely. But you are right, women can have it too.

  3. Lost Patrol

    “Do the men in your life a favor, and help cure their Oneitis. The whole world will be better off for it.” Amen.

    It is a particularly difficult illness to cure in the younger men, with relapse not only probable, but transferable as well. Oneitis sounds like it would only apply to one female for all time, but this isn’t so.

    Once the object of Oneitis, who paradoxically usually finds it off-putting, has made it completely clear that he is not her one; the poor sap will often as not transfer his Oneitis to another candidate and repeat the process. Ask me how I know.

  4. Anonymous Reader

    Random thoughts in not much order:

    Yes, women can have Oneitis. Sometimes it is part and parcel of a crush; we think of teenagers when rading or hearing the word “crush” but it ain’t always so. One can hear middle aged women talking about it.

    Oneitis in men does not just cloud reason, it can totally blot reason out, obscure it like an eclipse, and therein lies a huge danger that needs no further explanation.

    IMO those men who for in for White Knighting tend very strongly to oneitis, perhaps the reverse is true as well.

    “Soul mate” is a very romantic, and also Romantic notion. Probably it can be traced back to the era of Courtly Love hundreds of years ago.

    Echoing Donals and Lost Patrol, yes, it is very dangerous. The notion of “completion in the other person” is part of the “Soul Mate” fallacy.

  5. fuzziewuzziebear

    I think there is a good side to oneitis. Once a couple bonds, it assists in the process. Maybe the problem stems from men applying it before bonds form. Oops!

  6. MK

    Oneitis clearly evolved so men foolishly invest in women & children.
    Like women’s thug obsession (clearly evolved for fresh war material).
    Or why women hit the wall (clearly to stop investing in non-fertile women).

    These all help the tribe…at the expense of the individual.
    But it does pay for an individual to let somebody else pay the price!
    In a sense, this is what MGTOW & Game are all about: understanding sexual dynamics to avoid paying the tribe’s genetic toll.

    And why IQ inversely correlates with fertility, so it’s doomed to fail over time.
    And it’s why r-strategy is winning the fertility war in modern times; k-strategy folk are getting too smart for their own survival:
    http://www.unz.com/isteve/the-worlds-most-important-graph/

  7. Anonymous Reader

    fuzziewuzzibear
    I think there is a good side to oneitis. Once a couple bonds, it assists in the process. Maybe the problem stems from men applying it before bonds form.

    Uh…you’re still single, is that right?

  8. feeriker

    Two, they will give more and more power over to the other person if a relationship does develop.

    I have seen two close friends have their lives destroyed over this. One of them eventually committed suicide when “The One,” after playing him like a cheap piano, robbing him blind, and bankrupting him, took their toddler son and disappeared, literally in the middle of the night and without a trace.

  9. Some of these guys who do the Oneitis thing end up blowing their brains out when they find their wife in bed with Raoul, the personal trainer from 24 Hour Fitness.

  10. DJ

    It’s a delusion no matter how much you warn them if their not open to being challenged in their infatuation it will do nothing. Being there to pick them up when the bottom drops out might work better.

  11. @ DJ

    Being there to pick them up when the bottom drops out might work better.

    Sadly you are probably right.

  12. Just as most people come to Christ when their lives fall apart (as they are the most humble then), so too most men can only see the light about women when their lives fall apart.

  13. M.

    It seems that a good deal of this sort of thing is probably caused or exacerbated by the deleterious influence of an early and continuous exposure to television and the cinema. They watch utter poppycock portraying the supposed rapture of “being in love” and so forth from their infancy. Their parents are much too busy with other things to bother teaching them how things really are, and so they come to believe it. In earlier times such infatuation would have been regarded as a form of mental derangement. There was no expectation that entering the married state would bring about a transmutation of this miserable vale of tears into a terrestrial paradise as seems to the case today. Young people don’t realize that most things go wrong, or at least don’t turn out as well as one would have hoped. It is too bad that they generally have to learn by experience, rather than learning from the misfortunes of others as the wise man does.

  14. dvdivx

    Oneitis towards a woman ignores her fallen sin nature to your imperil. Oneitis towards Christ redeems you from your sin nature.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s