Adult Man Defines “A Real Woman”

Donal Graeme authored this list at the age of [redacted]. His closing comment: This list is not exhaustive and women like this do exist!

A real woman . . .
… doesn’t strive to be an equal to men. She understands that she was created to be a helpmeet, a suitable helper, to man and lives accordingly. (Genesis 2:18, 1 Corinthians 11:9)

…is quiet in church and asks men for spiritual guidance. (1 Corinthians 14:34-35, 1 Timothy 2:11)

…is chaste and ignorant of the sinful ways of the world. (Titus 2:4, Sirach 26:15)

…will embrace her femininity and not dress or present herself as a man. She will keep her hair long. (Deuteronomy 22:5, 1 Corinthians 11:6)

A real woman . . .
…isn’t embarrassed to cover her head when praying or spreading the Word of God. (1 Corinthians 11:2-16)

…knows that being wise and sensible is essential to being a Godly woman. (Proverbs 2:1-10, 1 Samuel 25:3, Tobit 6:12)

…won’t spend her prime years chasing a career and instead seeks to get married while she is still young, pretty, and fertile. (Proverbs 5:18, Sirach 15:2, Sirach 26:20)

A real woman . . .
…won’t try and usurp leadership when it isn’t her place. She doesn’t try to take over the role of men in church in order to prove something. (Titus 2:4, Ephesians 5:22-24, 1 Peter 3:1, 5-6, 1 Timothy 2:12)

…is kind so that “the word of God may not be discredited.” (Titus 2:4, Proverbs 31:26)

…knows better than to believe everyone, especially when they tell her things she wants to hear. (2 Timothy 3:6-7)

…would never think to gossip or spread lies. (Proverbs 16:28, 1 Timothy 5:13, 2 Timothy 3:2-3)

A real woman . . .

…will never date or become romantically entangled with a non-believer. (2 Corinthians 6:14-15)

…values her purity for the valuable thing that it is. She is not ashamed to live and act differently from the world in order to guard herself. (Sirach 26:15, 1 Corinthians 6:13-20)

… won’t be controlled or swayed by her base impulses. (2 Timothy 3:6)

… would never desecrate her body with a tattoo. (Leviticus 19:28)

A real woman . . .
… will never dress like a slut. She isn’t ashamed to dress differently from non-believing women. (1 Peter 3:3-4)

…doesn’t act like a bitch. She is polite and gracious to everyone she meets. (Proverbs 11:16, 1 Peter 3:4, Sirach 26:25)

…will keep her body fit and healthy. She doesn’t eat too much and won’t let herself become fat. (Proverbs 23:21, 31:17, Philippians 3:19)

…never gets drunk. (Titus 2:3, Sirach 26:8)

A real woman . . .
…loves her children and family. She won’t sacrifice them or eat them because it is convenient. (Titus 2:4, 2 Kings 6:26-30, Lamentations 4:10)

…is pleasant and expresses joy all the time. She never sulks about and laughs when things don’t go her way. (Proverbs 31:25, 1 Thessalonians 5:16)

…doesn’t blame others for her own problems, especially men, and instead embraces responsibility. (Proverbs 12:27)

…listens to the wisdom and teaching of her elders.  (Titus 2:4)

A real woman . . .
…controls her temper and her emotions. She refuses to let anger control her and bother those around her. She can deal with mood swings and rejects her innate emotional nature. Instead she approaches life from a clear-headed and logical perspective.  (Proverbs 14:29, Proverbs 17:27, Proverbs 25:24, Sirach 25:20)

…works hard, is capable of providing for a family and is financially responsible. (Proverbs 31:13-22)

…will not speak unless it is absolutely necessary. She refuses to chatter or nag. (Sirach 26:14, 27, 1 Peter 3:4, James 1:26)

… is a wonderful cook, and cooks every meal from scratch using fresh ingredients, unless her husband dictates otherwise. (Proverbs 31:14-15, Sirach 26:13)

[This post was inspired by this post by Allamagoosa.]

[Update: Added some suggestions from folks and tweaked the wording of the post somewhat.]

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19 Comments

Filed under Churchianity, Femininity, God, Marriage, Sex, Sin, Temptation, The Church, Women

19 responses to “Adult Man Defines “A Real Woman”

  1. I’ve got the feeling that I missed something in this post. If anyone catches it, let me know.

  2. She doesn’t waste her prime years chasing a career and instead seeks to get married while she is still young, pretty, and fertile?

    Oh yeah, and once she gets married she doesn’t withhold sex from her husband.

  3. femininebutnotfeminist

    She always wears dresses / skirts, always does something pretty with her hair, basically always looks like a feminine lady with effort put into it, not like a tomboy, and never “let’s herself go”.

    She never gets any tattoos of any kind.

    She is a wonderful cook, and cooks every meal from scratch, unless her husband decides he wants to take the family out to eat.

    She is loyal to the core, so she would never let anyone else’s comments cause her to think less of her husband / children / role as wife / mother, and would never even consider abandoning them for any reason.

  4. femininebutnotfeminist

    I know you meant this to be satirical, but it’s really not a bad list. While I doubt there’s such a woman that does 100% of the things on this list 100% of the time, it’s possible to do most of them 100% of the time, and all of them at least some of the time, with the right attitude. If anything, it’s a good list of things to look at and strive to be.

  5. One could also just go with the Proverbs 31 wife… but that would mean that one couldn’t be a real woman until one was old and had been married for most of one’s life.

    Which means that a man looking for such a paragon would never find one (as she would already be married to someone else.)

    Your list is good, but describes an ideal and an end result, not a starting point.

  6. Oh, this was supposed to be satirical? My bad.

  7. @ Alla

    First point is a good one. Will need to integrate that somehow. Second one is more of an after-marriage thing, and so not quite fitting with the rest of the list.

  8. @ FBNF

    Your last three suggestions are all solid, and I think I can get scriptural support for them. The first suggestion is tougher to support, although I might be able to think of something.

  9. @ Feather Blade

    No need to apologize. It was some pretty awful satire on my part. I made them out to be far too serious. I will try and correct that this evening and make them a little more obvious that they are satire. Unfortunately satire isn’t my strong suit, so no promises of success here.

  10. Feather Blade

    Well, best of luck with that.

    Satire is made more difficult when some people seriously propose what others mean as satire.

  11. Now, that is a comment with a lot of back story to it if there ever was one. I’d love to hear what is behind it (although I have my suspicions).

  12. The one missing thing is probably drunkenness. Women seem to love getting irresponsibly drunk, then abandoning all personal responsibility.

    The Shadowed Knight

  13. Good catch TSK. I’m going to make a pass to satirize this some more, and will add that.

  14. This list is not exhaustive and women like this do exist!

    It looks like “…in novels, the movies, and dreams” got cut off from this last sentence. Darned WordPress!

  15. Feather Blade

    that is a comment with a lot of back story to it if there ever was one.

    There is, of course, but it’s such a common and boring one among women (especially of the Christian or religious variety) that it isn’t really worth repeating.

    The point of the satire (and the article to which it is a response) is well taken though, that young men and young women impose unrealistic and (quite frankly, despair-inducing) starting requirements for their Ideal Mate, and they should Knock It Off.

    [DG: Indeed. We have made the perfect the enemy of the good.]

  16. mdavid

    FB, …impose unrealistic and (quite frankly, despair-inducing) starting requirements for their Ideal Mate

    To paraphrase Orbelian: I love my wife because she is mine.

    Having said this: any man who wishes to marry a virgin today is, well, screwed. And I don’t think this should be an unrealistic requirement for a Mate. Yet, today it’s unrealistic. The concept of Christian marriage for men has never been bleaker within the U.S.

  17. To paraphrase Orbelian: I love my wife because she is mine.

    An excellent and practical mindset.

    Having said this: any man who wishes to marry a virgin today is, well, screwed. And I don’t think this should be an unrealistic requirement for a Mate.

    In and of itself, it is not unreasonable. It’s that plus everything else on the list as starting requirements that is unreasonable.

    No one is going to find a young woman with all the virtues that only an entire lifetime of faithful service to God can endow on one.

  18. @ Feather Blade

    No one is going to find a young woman with all the virtues that only an entire lifetime of faithful service to God can endow on one.

    This is something that my next post on the subject is going to address. Lists like this focus on end results and finished products, when instead we should be looking at potential and accumulated progress.

  19. Pingback: What Qualities Should A Man Look For In A Wife? | Donal Graeme

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