I thought with this post I would provide a little insight into who I am. Namely, by providing some links to what I’ve been reading lately, as well as delving into my personality a bit.
Feed Your Head
Here are some of the posts that I have found particularly enlightening over the last week or two:
What are we teaching about what it means to be a Christian?– Loving in the Ruins
Types of Wives– Hearth to be Lovely
Rebellion as a Deadly Threat, and How to Love Men– Calculated Bravery
Zeal and Discernment– His Lordship’s Domain
Is Provision something we selected for? -Sarahs’ Daughter
and its follow up:
Frank Musings on Women’s Modesty – Resting in Apricity
Guest Post – by Zippy Catholic
(There was also a deep conversation that took place been Zippy, Scott and Cane Caldo in Zippy’s About page which I recommend to those interested in Christian theology and philosophy. It starts roughly here.)
Good Manners/Etiquette– Embrace Your Femininity
Christianity’s 26 Idols of the Age– Amos and Gromar
“What she said was not for the job or lover that she never had…” – Ace of Spades
The List and My List– Free Northerner
Marry the Lieutenant– TempestTcup
Uneasy Quiet– The Social Pathologist
Oh, and in honor of the title to this section:
Who is that Masked Man?
Strength of individual traits: Introversion – 49%, Intuition – 4%, Thinking – 16%, Judging – 33%.
So apparently I am an INTJ. Unsurprising, as I had tested myself years before and found the same results. Although I think the previous results were stronger in all of the fields. A little bit about INTJs:
The INTJ personality type is one of the rarest and most interesting types – comprising only about 2% of the U.S. population (INTJ females are especially rare – just 0.8%), INTJs are often seen as highly intelligent and perplexingly mysterious. INTJ personalities radiate self-confidence, relying on their huge archive of knowledge spanning many different topics and areas. INTJs usually begin to develop that knowledge in early childhood (the “bookworm” nickname is quite common among INTJs) and keep on doing that later on in life.
NTJ personalities are perfectionists and they enjoy improving ideas and systems they come in contact with. As INTJs are naturally curious, this tends to happen quite frequently. However, they always try to remain in the rational territory no matter how attractive the end goal is – every idea that is generated by the INTJ’s mind or reaches it from the outside needs to pass the cold-blooded filter called “Is this going to work?”. This is the INTJ’s coping mechanism and they are notorious for applying it all the time, questioning everything and everyone.
INTJ personalities also have an unusual combination of both decisiveness and vivid imagination. What this means in practice is that they can both design a brilliant plan and execute it. Imagine a giant chess board where the pieces are constantly moving, trying out new tactics, always directed by an unseen hand – this is what the INTJ’s imagination is like. An INTJ would assess all possible situations, calculate strategic and tactical moves, and more often than not develop a contingency plan or two as well. If someone with the INTJ personality type starts working with a new system, they will regard the task as a moral obligation, merging their perfectionism and drive into one formidable force. Anyone who does not have enough talent or simply does not see the point, including the higher ranks of management, will immediately and likely permanently lose their respect.
Most of this seems a fairly accurate assessment of my personality. I am definitely a bookworm, and approach most of life from a highly rational perspective. While I can be very emotional at times, I rarely show it, and certainly not in public. I love strategy games of all types, except, funnily enough, for chess (which I find lacking in depth compared to other games, the rules being too restrictive). Imagination? Check. Plans? Love ’em, especially when they turn out as they should. Despise higher-ups who get in the way of fixing problems? Double check.
I found the section on flaws to be particularly apt:
Every personality type has many weak spots and INTJs are not an exception. There is one area where their brilliant mind often becomes completely useless and may even hinder their efforts – INTJs find it very difficult to handle romantic relationships, especially in their earliest stages. People with this personality type are more than capable of loving and taking care of the people close to them, but they are likely to be completely clueless when it comes to attracting a partner.
That certainly describes me to a T. I suspect that many other manospherians tend to fall into this category as well. Driven by curiosity, I decided to see what else they had to say about INTJ’s and relationships. Some of it I found fascinating because it matches a bit of my experiences:
Paradoxically, someone with the INTJ personality is most likely to attract a romantic partner when they are not actually looking for one. As most INTJs have difficulties with dating and relationships, their self-confidence takes a major hit in those situations and the INTJ then overcompensates by showing off their intelligence, which makes them even more unattractive. Only when the INTJ returns to his or her usual self, their self-confidence starts glowing again and this makes it much easier for them to attract a partner.
This is something that has been a challenge for me for most of my life. Looking into my past, I realize I had more success attracting women who didn’t interest me as compared to those who did. This is because when I did direct my attention to an individual woman, my “Beta” (lack of Masculine Power) personality became more apparent.
The part on leaving relationships struck me in a powerful way:
People with the INTJ personality type may terminate the relationship if they are confident that it is at risk of breaking down, and not look back. INTJs’ approach to dating is quite similar – they will not keep trying if their mind is telling them that the likelihood of a strong relationship is very low. However, the calm exterior can be deceiving – it is more than likely that the INTJ will feel very hurt inside and spend extensive amounts of time figuring out what went wrong, especially if they had devoted a lot of time to dating or making the relationship work.
I tend to be very self-critical, and don’t take failure particularly well. While I don’t emotionally invest easily, I tend to invest heavily whenever I do. So I can easily see this assessment being accurate. I have no doubt that if I need to, I can and will walk away from something that won’t work. But it will hurt just the same.
Perhaps more relevant than the other parts of the relationship advice section were the suggestions on personality traits to look for in a mate:
Preferred partners: ENFP and ENTP types, as E and P outweigh the introvert and judgemental tendencies of INTJs. INFJs are also a very strong match as the intuitive connection between INTJ and INFJ is likely to be instantaneous.
That gives some ideas on the kinds of personalities I should search for. I’m not sure how much of a match I really would be for an extrovert; I need to give this further thought. Unfortunately, the logical alternative, INFJs, are also the rarest of the different personality types. Finding one who also meets my criteria is easier said than done. Well, no one ever said it would be easy.
And that brings this post to a close. Feel free to post other links you think are worthy of inclusion. Or you can analyze my personality and try to plumb the depths of my soul. Of course, if you would rather talk about Myers-Briggs in general, or discuss your own personality type, then be my guest.